6 Red Flags That He's a Player [AVOID THESE MEN]

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6 Red Flags That He's a Player [AVOID THESE MEN]
Now I got this question from one of my subscribers on YouTube, and I want to answer it for you. "Adam, please create a video on the subtle yet serious signs you've attracted a player, a narcissist, and/or sociopath. This would be incredibly helpful for women everywhere. Much love and thanks for all your wisdom." What a blessing you are, Catt. Thank you so much for your question.

So let's jump into those red flags that a man is a player.

Red Flag #1 is that he has a player lifestyle. Now, this is incredibly common for people who are in the entertainment space or even the hospitality space. For example, musicians, entertainers, comedians, people who tour around a lot, even bartenders or people who work in hospitality—people who are constantly out a lot with other singles—tend to have more of a player lifestyle because they just have access to a lot of other single women. And in my particular case, back in my early 20s, I used to be a dating coach for men where I'd actually go out with a group of guys, and I would help them build their confidence and overcome their social fears to be able to approach and meet women just like yourself. And needless to say, my lifestyle at the time wasn't exactly set up for me being in a very healthy relationship because I was constantly going out to singles bars and lounge bars all the time. And it really wasn't until I transitioned to coaching women that I was able to get out of that lifestyle and finally be in a healthy, long-term relationship.

Red Flag #2 is that he's almost a little too smooth. Men who are really good at picking you up and are really smooth on that first date are good at it for a reason—because they do it a lot. So beware if you meet a guy who seems like he's got every smooth answer and every witty thing to say the first time you meet him because chances are, he's had a lot of practice. And he's just practicing more with you. And on the flip side, I should say that all my closest guy friends who are just really good guys—like a good catch—they not only have a great lifestyle, but they also have great jobs and a lot to offer in a relationship. They're not necessarily the smoothest when it comes to approaching a woman or how they act on a first date. It's not until you actually get to know them on a second or even third date, where you realize how incredible of a catch these guys are.

Red Flag #3 is that the only thing that seems to matter is getting you into the bedroom. Does he seem to have no other interests other than getting in your pants? If you're getting the feeling when you first start talking to a guy that his only intentions are to hook up with you, then be very, very cautious. It's likely that he's just a player.

Red Flag #4 is that he's recently divorced and he's dating a lot. One pattern I've noticed with a lot of divorced men and especially the divorced men who got married the first time way too young is they come out of that divorce, and they just want to live that player lifestyle like they've got money. Now that they've got the cool car, they want to just go out and sleep with lots and lots of women, so be cautious of these guys. And if you're dating a guy who has just recently divorced and clearly is trying to live that lifestyle, be very, very cautious.

Red Flag #5 is that your dates tend to be more like hangouts than actual dates. When you go on a real date with someone, there tends to be an undercurrent of just romance in the conversation and it involves an emotional connection, whereas a hangout or a meetup is more about being intimate, and that's all that's coming out of it. So, if you've been talking to a guy for the past couple of months, and you've never even had a meal with this guy, and the only time you spend time with him is past the hours of 1:00 a.m, and it happens to be at a bar or a lounge while you're dancing up against him because you both are drunk—well, chances are he's just a player and only interested in one thing.

Red Flag #6 is that he outright tells you that he doesn't want a relationship. Now, this is the only time I'll give you dating advice where I will say that words matter more than actions. When someone tells you they don't want a relationship, listen to them. If he's telling you he doesn't want a relationship, I don't care what actions he's giving you or what signs he's giving you, listen to him. He is being honest with you that he's not at a point in his life where he can actually commit, and if you continue to invest your emotional energy into this guy, well, from that point forward, it's on you.

And now let's hear from you in the comments below. Have you ever dated a player and how did it go?