Rules Former First Ladies Have To Follow

Being married to the most powerful man in the free world comes with a few perks. You get to decorate the White House with Christmas trees that look like they were dipped in the blood of your husband's political rivals. You get to make some awesome fashion decisions, like wearing a jacket that says, "I really don't care. Do U?" during a visit to the U.S.-Mexico border to see detained migrant children. And there's no rule that says you have to hold your husband's hand if you don't want to, even if he is the president of the United States of America.

But that doesn't mean that every day is a party in the White House. There's also a ton of stuff that first ladies can't do.

For example, according to the White House archives, former First Lady Michelle Obama told Oprah that they weren't even allowed to open the windows while they lived there.

Life as a First Lady isn't necessarily a free ride, either. For the most part, the cost of everything from meals to haircuts to the designer dresses first ladies are expected to wear is on the first family. Bill and Hillary Clinton say they left the White House in debt. And even after their husbands leave office, first ladies still have to follow a ton of other rules for the rest of their lives.

We're all used to seeing the president and first lady being carted around in the back of sleek black sedans or SUVs. It makes sense that the Secret Service drives them around for security reasons. However, from the day they move into the White House, first ladies can pretty much say bye-bye to getting behind the wheel themselves for the rest of their lives. Michelle Obama told People magazine in November 2018, nearly two years after leaving the White House,

"No driving for me. We still live in a bubble."

At that time, security around the Obamas was still very tight due to the appearance of a bomb in the former president's mail the month before.

Michelle also lamented the loss of her pre-first lady anonymity. While she's still able to engage in leisurely activities like going out to eat or get some exercise, doing a bit of people-watching in the background of a cozy cafe is no longer possible for her -- not without drawing a presidential level of attention.

And if she was hoping to get out on the highway anytime soon, she could think again. As Hillary Clinton told the National Automobile Dealers Association during a speech in 2014,

"One of the regrets I have about my public life is that I can't drive anymore."

While it's not as strict a rule as the no-joyrides policy, it's a long-standing tradition for the first lady who is saying goodbye to the White House to give a private tour to the one moving in. However, it's not always the most amiable encounter.

In her 2016 book about America's first ladies, author Kate Andersen Brower wrote that some departing first ladies can be a bit spiteful during the tour. Mamie Eisenhower reportedly gave Jackie Kennedy a rather cool reception, and Nancy Reagan almost didn't even give a tour to incoming First Lady Barbara Bush.

The last few first ladies have at least been a bit more cordial to each other, keeping up a tradition within the tradition, which involves showing off a specific window in the first lady's dressing room that gives a uniquely pleasant view. During Hillary Clinton's turn to host the tour for Laura Bush, she told the incoming first lady,

"Your mother-in-law stood right here and told me that from this window you can see straight down into the Rose Garden and also over to the Oval Office."

Laura Bush showed off the same view to Michelle Obama eight years later.

Tradition hasn't really been the Trump family's forte during his term as president, so it's no surprise that Melania reportedly declined to extend a similar White House tour invitation to Jill Biden, and show off what she's done with the place.

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